Is there an opposite of caregiver burnout?
We’re always looking for ways of making life easier for us and our parents. Occasionally we run across a great resource that we’ve never seen before and wonder why. Today’s find is a book called Share the Care. As most caregivers know, burnout is not only a real threat to the caregiver, it most certainly removes the possibility of the rewards of caregiving. But what if it didn’t have to be that way? As the name implies, if you share the caregiving, the rewards can be greater for all.
The concept of ‘sharing the care’ was not specifically designed with the elderly in mind, yet it’s extremely applicable. The book was written by a couple of women who, among others, were were formed into a group at the suggestion of Dr. Sukie Miller who was treating a patient with a terminal illness. Ultimately it lead to others to ask how they could do it, then a book and ultimately a website.
I think one of the things that appeals to me about this is that when someone has terminal illness, and we’re not a primary caregiver, it’s hard to know how to help…and we often don’t. Share the care makes it easier to know what to do. Sharing the care decreases that chance of burnout and increases the chance that the person in need will get the quality of support they deserve while helping friends and family to know when and how they can help.
While managing the first group, some issues came up regularly and ultimately were turned into seven principles for caregivers.
- Sharing responsibility is the key to not “burning out.”
- It won’t work unless everyone gains something personally.
- Know your limits and stick to them.
- There’s no one right way to do it.
- Anyone who wants to help should be encouraged.
- Trust the group; support each other.
- Keep your own life in good working order.
Again, the thing that I find particularly appealing about this approach is that it’s a loose and fairly unstructured, organization. The commitment can be low when need be. People can step in to fill the gaps where needed. If someone has to drop out for awhile, they can. The points that go with the first principle do a nice job of illustrating this:
- No one person has to be in charge all the time.
- No one person has to deal with every crisis.
- No one person has to be “on call” every single day.
- No one person has to make all the decisions, all the time.
- No one person has to try to run his own life plus the entire, complex life of his loved one.
- Let the others do their share. They want to. They need to.
If you, or someone you know, is faced with caring for an individual with Alzheimer’s, Parkinson, or another terminal illness, Share the Care.
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